


Balance

by AnonymousDumbass



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa: Another Episode, Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc
Genre: Angst, Cunnilingus, Dont tell komaru, Emotional Driven Plot, Emotions, F/F, Fisting, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, HOORAY, I dont like him very much, Lesbian Sex, Ok tbh dont read if you dont want spoilers, Okay so like fuck togami, Oops, Plot, Porn with Feelings, This is effectively a soap opera now, Togami hit Fukawa, Vaginal Fingering
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-17
Updated: 2020-03-24
Packaged: 2020-10-20 18:42:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 19,498
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20680118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnonymousDumbass/pseuds/AnonymousDumbass
Summary: This is a serious book now.There's a plot. And that shit. That shits good.Toko and Komaru make eachother whole. But don't they have to be whole themselves?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Please be polite but I do want criticism! I've never written something like this before, or at least this explicitly. 
> 
> If it's any good you can make requests for what else I can do!

Komaru sat on a quiet bench in the dead of night. It creaked when she leaned backward and groaned when she leaned forward. She wasn't alone. Toko was burrowed into her side, drifting and floating away into a dreamless sleep. But alas, Komaru couldn't sleep. Thoughts raced through her head, a whirlwind of shrapnel and splinters. Each shard marred her head. Towa City was a disturbed, hallowed place. Simply staring into the street the pale outline of rotting bodies was skirting the edge of her vision.

All she could do was continue to play with Toko's lengthy, violet hair. Yes. Focused. Left, Center, Right, Center, Left, Center, Right, Center. Undo. Redo. A steady beat of twisting and turning and braiding and plaiting.

Her fingers tightened at the end of the section of hair. It was silky and oily; Komaru guessed she'd washed it about a week ago. She couldn't blame her as they both smelled like blood, effort, and sweat. The night air was cold and stiff and pressed hard against her throat. It stung in her eyes. 

But sitting next to Toko, a mellow heat spread from her chest. A feeling of longing affection. Komaru drew weary of this feeling. It brought her back to all the nights she longed for Toko's heart to return this warmth. But with that feeling, she also grew scared. Scared of the sickening bite of rejection and the bitter wall of discomfort that would then stifle the two. If her feelings weren't shared then would it ever be normal between them again?

And there were so many more important things at hand. Her feelings certainly didn't compare to the end of the world. No matter how much she felt like it did.

It had started as such a small inkling. A smudge of a crush on a friend. Something she could push away as nonsense.

Now like a Hanahaki flower it bloomed. The foreign emotion sprouted and petals touched every corner of every fiber of her being. And in a way, it was choking her. She was such a spazz she couldn't think to breathe when she was around her.

Toko stirred against her side. Komaru pulled her hand out of the long purple hair and wrapped it around her side. Toko put a hand up to adjust her glasses, which had fallen crooked in the past few hours she'd been sleeping. She looked up at Komaru and gave a soft frown. "Was I sleeping?" Her tone had the usual irritated barb softened by honey-sweet drowsiness "This is usually the other way around."

Komaru looked into her eyes as she thought. Something about her voice parted the cloudy storm in her mind. "I don't mind. But if we have a place to sleep inside we should take advantage of it," She gestured vaguely towards the hotel they'd been staying with her eyes. Well, stay is an overstatement. They just slept in one of the rooms whenever the opportunity presented itself for rest. Togami had refused to sleep near them, opting to rest on the first floor, where they stayed on the fourth. They had been sitting on a bench outside just to get a breath of fresh air when Toko fell asleep. Though it wasn't her fault; The mission they'd just got back on had lasted four days and nights. 

Komaru also, couldn't explain why she was awake. Something itching in the back of her mind, like a bug bite on the back of your leg. Annoying you, driving you bonkers till you're up a wall and bat blind. She shook her head the smallest bit. Her focus was fleeting and flying away like a bird whose cage spontaneously opened.

"Ah, that's a good idea." Toko stretched her back against the bench and drowsily pulled herself to a standing position.

They intertwined fingers to walk up the three flights of stairs to their room. Her head felt fuzzy. They had at one time had different rooms. But Komaru and Toko had both had nightmares frequently enough that they began to share a room. Toko still refused to sleep in the same bed; except on nights when someone had a particularly rotten one. Just a drop of fear melted away any hard exterior she had left around Komaru.

The door to the room creaked open slowly. At this point, Toko had started leaning into her shoulder, to the point where she was practically carrying her. Komaru made her way to the second bed that Toko had marked her own. She slumped her shoulder to let her down slowly. Reaching to the far side of the bed, she covered her with half the blanket, sandwiching between the left and right side.

She slid her shoes off of her heels. As she lifted the covers on her bed, she heard a fluffy mewl from behind her.

"Dekomaru…"

Komaru swiveled around to face the endearing voice that called out to her. A little more eagerly then she wanted to let on, but that's okay.

"Stay with me?"

Her heart skipped a beat. And then sped up to a million beats a second. And then she stopped breathing for a few seconds. Then she finally calmed herself.

"I-In your bed? With you?"

"Please?"

Komaru took a deep, sighing, and staggering breath.

"Why?"

She heard Toko shuffle in her blanket cocoon. "D-don't question me. I just don't wanna s-sleep alone r-r-right now."

Komaru smiled to herself gently and stepped towards Toko's bed. She followed the sound of her voice, for the small hotel room wasn't lit and this late at night moonlight pooled in gingerly. The side of Toko's face was illuminated by quiet light. Her skin was smooth and a silvery porcelain in color. The glimmer highlighted her jawline and sharp cheekbones. Her glasses were laid next to her pillow; something she must've done when Komaru wasn't looking. 

Komaru laid down on Toko's right side, behind her body and behind the cover wrap. 

"Hmm. Get in the covers with me." 

Komaru's face was burning. Briefly she played with the idea that Toko could probably feel the warmth radiating off her cheeks. She carefully unwrapped the blanket, slipped in with her, and recovered herself and Toko. She wrapped her arms around Toko's torso. She felt Toko settle into position with the shape of her body.

Komaru felt her heat against her's. Komaru felt her breath in and out.

In and out.

In and out.

She slowly let Toko's sleep guide her to rest of her own. It was a quiet night, with only the peacefully quiet snores of both girls to break the heavy silence. In this city of destruction, despair, and dead bodies, maybe there was hope for her after all.

***

Toko rubbed her eyes. Morning light filtered in from a window behind her. She could also feel Komaru, cuddling her from behind, and hear her drowsy snores. Though her memory was hazy she very much remembered inviting Komaru to join her.

She raised a hand to feel around for her glasses. She found them half-sheathed in her pillowcase. Slipping them into her face Toko looked toward the clock. 7:34. The digital clock's characters illuminated by the weak red light. They had a bit of time before they needed to be up. Right? Couldn't she just stay here, curled up in Komaru's gentle embrace, warm and cozy with cotton-like sunbeams caressing her cheek with yellow anesthesia...

Toko shuffled quietly over to her other side. She faced Komaru's slumbering body, her face lost in peaceful dreams, much more peaceful than the anarchy that stood outside this very building. Without realizing it, she began to study her face. Her fair complexion was a creamy color of peach. Long, sleek eyelashes fluttered with her breath, that kept an even, dragging pace, rising and falling in her chest. Toko began to manually breathe, keeping her lungs timed to Komaru's metronome. She watched her brow furrow and crinkle and her lips perk at the corners. A beautiful smile, obviously befitting of such a beautifully exquisite girl.

Toko scolded herself. Should she be thinking about her friend like this? 

Well, she did get into bed with me.

She let out a raspy sigh. If anything's a clear sign of "I like you!" It's probably that. But it didn't calm the ticking feeling of anxiety that dried her throat and anchored her stomach. This uncertainty felt like a burdened certainty she would constantly be forced to deal with.

Toko focused back on her best friend. She looked at her lips. Her smooth, shiny lips that smiled wistfully at a dream her mind had conjured up. Just a little bit closer that's all she wanted. To feel her tepid skin on her own, cold and harsh.

In her groggy indecisiveness, she almost didn't know when her body moved for her. The next moment she suddenly felt Komaru's lips against hers. She tasted like sweet syrup, like a raspberry lip balm from the dollar store. But it was probably the best thing she'd ever tasted. It was tender and gentle, just soft enough to try and not wake her up. She pulled away from her sleeping beauty and touched her fingers to her lips like she couldn't believe what she had just done.

She savored that moment. Flirtatious heat rushed to her cheeks. Her breath hitched in her throat. Laying next to this girl, adoring her lavish beauty, feeling the luxurious velvet of her rose-pink lips. They were soft and plump, and just the smallest bit slick and glossy. That was the only thing in the world that ever could have mattered. 

Then Komaru's eyes flew open.

Wild panic was her first response, but her body froze instead of diving for the floor. 

She choked out a sentence. "I-i-i didn't k-know you were a-a-awake." 

The cacophony of silence stung behind her eyes. It stretched for many moments, both girls eyes searching for something in the others.

It was finally cut by Komaru pulling Toko towards her by her hips. Their lips were together once more, an intimate way of saying, I love you too. Toko twisted her fingers into Komaru's short hair as if trying to pull them even closer together. She felt teeth hungrily nipping at her bottom lip. Komaru must have been dying for this moment as much as she had. And now she was dying for entrance. For more.

Toko was definitely more than happy to comply with Komaru's greedy demands. She felt hot, and her face was burning a mad shade of blush. 

They pulled away when their lungs burned for air. Between pants, Komaru stumbled over her words, "I was. Yeah. Awake and," Pant, "I wasn't totally not," Heavy breaths, "Totally not watching. You. Um. Sleep or anything-"

Toko abruptly cut off her endless fountain of nervous word vomit with sudden confidence.

"Shut up and kiss me."

She pushed their lips together once more. The distance they had felt only made it so much better. She pressed herself against Komaru's heat. Soft boobs against her own made her head swim with sensation. She let out a quiet moan into her mouth. 

Something about that melodious sound must've really riled up Komaru, because following the syrupy sound of Toko's happiness she finally took action. She pushed herself down on the bed over Toko. Toko's hand still grabbed and kneaded into Komaru's hair, twirling tendrils of brown in between her fingers. She smiled into the kiss. A fiery sensation burned in Toko's stomach. Her hand trailed down from her hair, stopping so briefly on her chest, and grabbed a hold on the ribbon of her uniform. Tugging her close against her once again felt so good.

Komaru slyly slipped her thigh between Toko's. She delicately held Toko's wrist to the blanket, while very careful to be gentle. Both girls' hearts fluttered, and faces lit aflame. Toko felt a tingling warm, spreading feeling, rushing up from between her legs. It hit every nerve, every crevice of her scarred body. The rivulet of lovely euphoria forced all the air out of her lungs with a low moan.

She needed more.

She pulled on the ribbon a little bit harder, pulling it swiftly undone. Komaru took this as a sign for more action. She ran her hands smoothly from Toko's cheek, making her leisurely way to her tender breast, and drifting down all the way to the hem of her uniform. Toko shivered under her touch. It was just as warm as she had imagined. Her toasty hands slipped under the fabric, feeling their way up the milky white torso in front of her. 

Komaru pulled herself off of Toko's starved lips. Toko felt a bit colder for only the loneliest moment before she felt a sultry mouth planting lust filled kisses on her neck. "S-such a dirty girl Komaru," She teased, with a crooked smile, "Ah!" A small gasp escaped as a sensitive spot on her neck felt the placid touch of her companion. She felt her shirt be roughly pulled up just above her chest. 

"How can I not be Toki?" Her respond earned a cute giggle and a tighter hold around her neck. "You're beautiful.." Komaru lifted herself to look into her pearlescent lavender eyes. She quickly ducked into a fast and passionate kiss before pulling away and pulling over Toko's uniform and subsequently her own. It's too stuffy to sleep in clothes, anyway. 

Komaru's gaze stared down her body from above, and she could almost feel her eyes tracing the curve of her bust, and the slight round of her hip. Her creamy pale skin was dyed dandelion by sunrise. Toko squirmed, just the tiniest bit under her ravenous emerald eyes. They made a pit of anxiety appear in her stomach where it wasn't before. What was this? This is what she had wanted for months. Why was she so scared? Komaru must've noticed the look in her eyes because she drew back.

"What's wrong?"

Toko avoided eye contact. "I've fantasized about this." Her voice seemed uneasy and vacant when she said it. Like she wasn't all there. She hunched her shoulders, feeling small underneath Komaru.

Komaru chuckled quietly. "So have I."

Toko's eyes flickered to her's. The concern she obviously felt was painted on her face, seeping through her worried eyebrows and parted lips. "I love you, so, so much." 

Surprise shook Komaru's expression. Glistening tears welled in her eyes. Toko felt scared, had she said something wrong? Hadn't she, a dim, stupid girl! Why would she tell her she loved her? What if she didn't feel the same. Love is a pretty hasty jump from more than friends. Oh, fuck oh fuck oh fuck. "I-I-I'm sorry, p-please don't c-cr-cry I c-can't-t!"

She stopped herself short and unwrapped her arms from around her neck.

I silent moment lingered not but a second too long.

"I love you too."

She felt herself trembling. It was like her heart took a feathered flight. She was crying now, too, the same salty taste of joy. The heavy feeling in her stomach dissolved once more, and she put her hands on Komaru's face to pull her in. 

They quickly got back into the thick of the action. Now reassuringly fueled by love, and not alone lust, they kissed with sharp intensity. Toko's hands sensually moved down Komaru's neck, down her back to the hook of her bra. Her nimble (and later proven very useful) fingers made quick work of that bra, as it was now laying on the floor next to the bed. Awestruck, she took in the magnificent sight of Komaru's tits. Supple and round, they far surpassed her own. Goddamn. She was so gorgeous. Toko could write paragraphs about her body, perhaps even a short story.

She brought her hand like silk down from her shoulders and caressed her luscious breasts. She massaged the sensitive tissue with great vigor, clasping the vulnerable bud between her thumb and forefinger. That's what people always do in these scenes, right? A few quiet moans slipped out of Komaru's mouth, giving her quick reassurance of her actions. She began doing this with both of her tits, now faster than before. 

Komaru pulled off her lips and let out an erotic sound, a gasping moan right into Toko's ears. Hot breath on her neck made lightning shoot down her spine. Komaru's mouth begged for air in sloppy pants, and she seemed unable to stabilize her breathing from hot sticky lust. Toko leaned her head forward to take a tit into her mouth. Her tongue made circles around her nipple, feeling it stiffen and erect under her taste buds. It was obvious from Komaru's excited and needy moans, she didn't feel like this often.

Komaru bit her lip, a drawn-out groaning musical sound emphatically escaping. Toko pulled herself off long enough to roll her beloved underneath her. She used her limited strength to push Komaru up to a sitting position against the headrest, and kneeled in front of her, like a symbol of worship to her heavenly mistress. Her hand drew down the hem of the soft cotton panties before her. She heard a gentle mewl of anticipation from above her as she slipped the underwear from around her ankles. 

Komaru was now in nothing but a schoolgirl skirt, and something about that screamed kinky in Toko's mind.

She began slowly, stamping kisses all up and down her thighs, as she had read about numerous times. All she could pray was her memory served her well in this intimate moment. After making her way up to the other girl's pussy, she sensually licked every crevice of her southern lips. It was just shining with slick, erotic, girl juices. Soft, thick thighs squeezed against her head. She took her arms below her knees and propped her legs above her shoulders. To keep this in place, her hands gripped mercifully into her thighs. Now, after this readjustment, Toko continued her benevolent assault on Komaru's pussy. 

***

Komaru's body was hot and steamy, every hungry trace of Toko's tongue sending massive pleasing waves up her body. It made every inch of her body tense up submissively at Toko's demand. Her confident movement shook the younger girl's previous assertiveness. A lolling smile was plastered to her face, and her eyes shut close.

Komaru was almost taken aback by Toko's seeming expertise. She wasn't very sexually experienced, and she would gladly lay down her first time to Toko. Toko's mouth felt perfect everywhere it touched, on her tits, up her thighs, and especially where it was now. 

While Toko concentrated on stimulating her lover's clit, Komaru found it increasingly harder to concentrate at all. Every place that the woman touched was suddenly intensely burning, her finger a matchstick. The slow bonfire lit every part of her, Toko's work tending to it made it a gradually stronger feeling of pleasure.

She used her arm to grip the headboard behind her, trying desperately to maintain composure. 

***

Toko's eyes fluttered up towards Komaru's, and a horny feeling ravaged the author's growingly soaked panties. She licked and sucked and kissed at Komaru's clit faster even than before. Impatient heat drove both girls into a wild lust. 

Toko unwrapped one of her arms and used it's hand to begin circling her entrance. Komaru let out a squeal at the sudden touch. "Please!" It was needy, demeaning and submissive. And Toko loved it. 

Slowly, a single finger pushed its way in. Komaru gasped with a loud, "Ah!~~" in response. It didn't sound like it hurt, in fact, it sounded much the opposite, so Toko began immediately thrusting her middle finger in and out, in time with her mouth. Komaru's nails dug into her hair, and a fountain of pleasured wails erupted from parted, drooling lips.

***

Toko made a steady rhythm, pumping her long, slender finger into Komaru's velvety pussy over and over again. Komaru's moans rung louder and louder again through the desolate hotel. Her legs were shaking and thin sweat draped over top of her. A tight hot knot pitted her stomach, however, it wasn't from fear or dread. No this was something she'd never felt before. It felt so good, but she knew well enough to know it got better.

"Ah! Fuck! I'm so close Tok-Oh!~" She begged for a climax from her lover so dearly. Toko had never heard the younger girl cuss before, and it suited her greatly in this sultry, passionate moment. Toko pushed another finger to join her first, thrusting into Komaru's tight, wet pussy. She arched her back off the headrest. This pressure, this heavenly feeling, was finally Komaru's breaking point. Toko's fingers probably had a harder time moving, her pussy constricting so taut around her hand. She kept her hand moving and massaging deep inside, letting Komaru fully enjoy the bloom of lust in her center.

Komaru felt a flood of fever, fire attacking at all her senses. A fierce euphoria swept her away from reality, her mind going scalding white whilst Toko fucked her so much better than she'd ever done herself. Her lover's fingers curled slightly, hitting right on the money. It someone had walked past the room, at that moment, they probably would've thought someone was dying. That was how loud Komaru's infatuated moans were. You could probably have called them screams and it would be nicely befitting of such a noise. But it was all a beautiful blur to her.

All her muscles (exception to her center) went slack in relaxation. This irresistible feeling of climax, of full and devoted love. She was only just aware of the messy release she made onto Toko's face in the process.

Komaru drifted back into reality, slowly and satisfied. Toko was lapping up as much of her sloppy cum as she could like it was her reward for a job well done. A good amount squirted around her face and the sheets, a puddle of cum soaking through the bedding. Komaru panted, riding out the feeling of ecstasy that had just engulfed her. She began to once again have coherent thoughts. The first of these, being,

"Holy shit."

The latter being,

"I love you."

***

Toko carefully pulled out of her lover's pussy and sat up. She pulled her in for a tender kiss, full of love and caramel-sweet cherishment. Oh how long she had wished to see her like this. A moaning mess unable to think about anything but her. How much she wanted to make her feel such a saccharine intoxication under her gelid hands. 

For many countless minutes, they stayed in place, their foreheads touching and breaths intertwined. Like porcelain, they laid still. The room was steamy and the feeling of passion hung in every breath. It caught in their throats with every ragged breath. All was quiet for many intimate minutes.

Komaru was the one who broke the stillness, using her hand to entrancingly feel all the way down Toko's body. She went over the jutting bone of her collar, then the supple and warm skin of her breast, next the smooth, flat texture of her stomach, and finally the dip of her waist that ran to her valley in between her hips. Toko's breath caught for a heartbeat, the aroused feeling she had somehow forgotten about even more apparent and raging now. Komaru slipped nimble fingers through the slit of her skirt, gently teasing the purple-haired girl's clit through her panties. She pushed herself on top of Toko once again, pushing Toko against the strewn and messied sheets.

Toko welcomed the change of pace. Insecurity now racked her brain about her performance on top and she'd much rather not deal with it at a time like now. And Komaru seemed to enjoy it very thoroughly despite that thought. Komaru's prodding fingers brought her back to reality. She ran her fingertips from just above her clit, all the way down her lips and back and teasingly slow. It was excruciating and she didn't know if Komaru was doing it on purpose just to torture her.

"P-please.." She managed to choke out.

A sneaky smirk grew onto her lover's face. "What was that?" She whispered tentatively, applying more pressure to the dampened cloth, but not daring hasten her pace. Now Toko was sure that she understood exactly what she was doing. 

Fuck.

Komaru's demeanor changed, rearranging to a dominating disposition. She took up her previous strategy of leaving stamped kisses on Toko's pale neck, moving away to reveal purple shadows. This earned a hungry moan of pleasure and greed from the panting mess beneath her. "Please Komaru, more~ Nghh!" 

Toko begged, and in doing so noticed how much she was aroused by both begging and being begged. 

Komaru moved her hands faster, but not by much. Her kisses made their way down to her smaller bust and encircled the perked nipple with a quick flick of her tongue. The combination of these trying sensations put Toko is thick heat, her face reddening with a blush. Komaru pulled her hand away and snaked it through the elastic of her panties. Her gentle fingertips felt down the coarse hair and Toko bit her lip.

Komaru took her scandalous panties and slipped them down her legs and around her ankles. When she made her way back up to even with Toko, they shared a zealous kiss before Komaru moved her hand back down toward her pussy.

As she made her way to her bare center, Toko let out a staggered panting sound, "Aah! Ha-ah-ha ahh..~" Toko wrapped her arms around Komaru's neck and dug her nails into her hair. She felt Komaru smile into the passionate kiss with one of her breasts as she rubbed her two fingers against her clit. She ran her fingers over it, and then down to dip into her shallow wetness of her pussy. She went back and forth with a steady and somewhat faster pace.

Toko sighed and groaned from deep inside her chest. She closed her eyes and furrowed her brow. Delight spread with the slickness on Komaru's fingers. It radiated through her in rippling radiating waves, from her quivering center, her erect tits, and the hypnotic entrancement in her head. Komaru sped up once again. She was now at what could be considered a reasonable pace. Toko let herself moan out, though through gritted teeth. 

Komaru pulled her mouth off of Toko's left boob, only to switch and give the other a bit more love. She sucked on the rosebud with surprising force. Her two fingers traced around the clit in a curved motion, rubbing with tender pressure and rigorous speed.

Lust and desire tingled in Toko's stomach. She barely raised her voice, no higher than a whisper. "P-Please don't t-tease me.." She felt the masochistic relish of painful need, a spike of excitement released into her blood.

Komaru forcibly pried herself from Toko's chest. She looked into her pleading eyes and Toke felt a rush of luster as she took her two fingers and circled the entrance. She took a moment to let Toko prepare.

"You have to tell me to stop if it hurts, okay?" Toko almost laughed, fully understanding that possibility. And understanding that it stopped hurting a long time ago. But she played along with Komaru's naive notion that Toko didn't have much experience in the fingering department. 

She nodded in an eager thrill. Well, not too eager. She hoped. She was waiting in anticipation so hot and lustful she almost didn't care.

***

Komaru carefully pushed her fingers into Toko's ready entrance. The older girl sucked air in through between her teeth. She smiled and grinded her hips against the slender hand. As Komaru began to thrust her two fingers in and out of Toko's already soaking wet pussy, she felt the invigoration of watching Toko squirm and moan beneath her loving touch. Toko dug her nails into her shoulders and Komaru smiled with guilt.

She pumped her fingers harder and quicker, forcing a spur of moans out of Toko's ecstatic and crooked lips. Both girls enjoyed this wholeheartedly, skin hot and slick with sweat. Bloodrush rosied both of their faces as Komaru pulled Toko's mouth towards hers. 

Toko let Komaru do as she pleased to her, mewling and purring and moaning and panting. Komaru learned from example, and curled her fingers up toward where (she could only hope) her g-spot had to be. 

Much to her thrill, she seemed to be right. She felt nails claw at her shoulder much harder now and feared she might have actually drawn blood. Toko screamed in ecstasy and her eyes rolled up. Her mouth was glued into a droopy and sloppy smile. Komaru had never seen her look so beautifully vulnerable. 

***

Toko had never once felt this glorious a bliss. A stark white haze of warmth spread from her heart and pussy. She felt herself cum all over Komaru's hand, which was still thrusting through her orgasm. Happy contentment curled her lips upwards. Her legs were shaking and her thighs felt sticky. Maybe she would be forced to shower this morning after all.

Toko didn't have any break, as Komaru continued to ruthlessly fuck her. She released her tight grip on Komaru's shoulders. Her neck felt flush with embarrassment that she had come so hard so quickly.

Toko pulled herself slightly off of the bed and asked through pants, simply, "Huh?"

Komaru laid her back down softly and kissed her so kindly in contrast to her hands. She leaned down and murmured into her ears, "I'm not done with you yet."

Toko purred with boiling excitement. 

***

For Komaru, it was inherently difficult to sound sexy, as her bubbly and cute personality lends itself to her higher, obscenely girlish voice. But as the words came out of her mouth, they were blessed with utter confidence.

Komaru's brain worked, forming an idea in her head. She built a roughly solid plan in her mind, and though she must admit it could be painful, she thought Toko could most likely handle it. And if it did work, she would definitely like it.

She proceeded with her plan, adding her index finger to her two already inside Toko. Toko moaned out, and Komaru was filled with vivacity. She thrust in and out determinedly, encouraged by the sloppy wet sound Toko's pussy made with every push. 

Komaru worked Toko's pussy, moving her fingers not only in and out but in a scissoring motion inside her. Toko was still steadily increasing in volume. She took this as a good sign. The next step was inherently easy. She slipped her pinky finger in with the rest and used it in unison with the rest. Her four fingers all slid in and out with ease. Her plan would work nicely.

***

"Ah good god- FUCK!~ OH!"

Toko screamed. It was a simple sound. Her pussy was invaded by all of Komaru's fingers at once. They moved inside of her and massaged all her walls. Her entire body was pulsating with frenzy, and her mind was glowing with euphoric fervor. It was an understandable reaction.

Komaru fucked her with so much conviction and fire that Toko's tongue hung out of her mouth. She couldn't keep herself thinking properly, much less keep herself composed. Lust made every inch of her skin tingle, and it was hot to the touch.

She felt Komaru slow, and she took many deep breaths. Maybe she was pulling out? Was she done? She hoped not. Toko was very much not done. 

The quick answer she got was no, as Komaru coiled her fingers into a fist. 

"Aaghrrr… OOOOH," She groaned. Komaru's fingernails scraped at her insides. Her knuckles stretched her insides. It's too much! I can't fit all of it! She squealed as Komaru slowly started rotating her hand, carefully making room for her fist. Nails dug into Komaru's shoulders once again. Her insides stretching stung at first, but as she continued to delicately move the feeling ebbed away gradually. Pain, while rather lively in itself, soon became replaced with magnificent rapture. Her pussy became drenched from lovely sensation.

Komaru paused. "Are you okay?" 

Toko took a deep breath in. "Y-y-yeah." Komaru's fist began to slowly shift up and down, in clement thrusts. Toko let moans dribble out of her mouth as her pussy was toyed with so roughly. She felt so submissive, so wonderstruck by Komaru's firm assertiveness. She never would've thought that Komaru would think of this. 

She closed her eyes and let Komaru ravage her soaking wet pussy. Toko melted into a thoughtless euphoria once again.

***

Komaru got faster bit by bit, no longer to tease her, but out of care. Toko's reaction to everything up this point was absolutely irresistible, and her responses seemed unmistakably positive. 

Over the course of several sexy minutes, and so many more gratifying moans, Komaru was pounding into her pussy at a stable and steady pace. Toko's walls squeezed around her hand, and her alluring sounds got sweeter and hotter. Komaru could tell she was getting close. What would really drive her over the edge?

Komaru took a moment to contemplate, while her hand worked on autopilot. Maybe this would be a good moment for dirty talk? She tossed it over in her mind. How Toko's face lit up when she told her she wanted more. However, she very much did not know how to do so. She thought over different lines before deciding on the one she thought sounded best. Komaru, very abruptly, knew exactly what to say.

She laid her head near Toko's ear. Warm kisses were placed on her neck before Komaru whispered in a deep voice, "I love you, babe."

***

"I love you babe"

Toko's heart pounded. She was being fisted so hard her brain felt like jelly. She was so close to cumming she thought she was going to scream. And Komaru's voice told her that she loved her. 

Komaru was the most amazing, beautiful thing in Toko's life. They were together through thick and thin, though most of their friendship had withstood the thick. And all Toko's life there had been no one who had loved her the way her heart continued to love. Not Byakuya or anyone else. 

And now she had someone. She had love.

Toko howled as orgasm overtook every part of her body. For the second time tonight, the only thing she could think was Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck! But now in a much better context. Ardor spread like a fire in California through all her limbs and her head was drowning in sweet euphoria. Her cum squirted onto Komaru's entire arm. She hugged Komaru so close as her thrusts slowed, and left her skewered by her lover's hand.

Toko waited until every rippling wave of ecstasy had left an impression in her mind. Komaru ever cautiously worked her hand out of Toko. They kissed with blushing amour.

Komaru giggled. "I think I need to clean off my hand" Toko blushed in timid embarrassment. Komaru reached over to the tissue box on the bedside table and used an almost ungodly amount to wipe away all of her cum. Komaru wrapped her arms around Toko's waist. She pecked her on the cheek before saying, "Maybe we can go back to sleep for a little while. We can deal with Togami later."

Toko giggled and kissed her in turn. "Yeah, that sounds like a good idea." Her pants punctuated the beginning and end of her statement.

Komaru pulled her in tightly, and Toko nestled her head, using Komaru's plush breasts as a pillow. Her breaths slowed and her cheeks pigmentation settled down to a complimentary pink. She let herself fall asleep to the steady sound of Komaru's heart, beating perfectly in time with her own.

***

Knock knock knock.

Byakuya was impatient. The useless pest Toko and her bluntly stupid sidekick should've been up hours ago. They needed to be on a conference call in fifteen minutes. 

"We have to connect with Future Foundation in fifteen! Get out here, now!" He grumbled at the door. 

A groan from inside the room echoed. He heard the sound of someone shuffling out of sheets and standing up. The person's footsteps got closer to the door until it suddenly swung open.

Komaru was the one behind it. However much to Byakuya's surprise, she was only wearing her skirt. He felt himself shamefully blush. "C-Cover yourself, woman!"

She tapped her foot impatiently. "Toko is still sleeping. Push the call back an hour and I'll get her up." The door swung back towards his face. From across the door, he heard Komaru yell, "And don't you dare knock on that door again." In a cutesy passive-aggressive voice.

He stood out in front of the girls' room for a moment, confused, concerned, and shaken.

What the hell was that?


	2. Muddled Memoirs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toko can only dream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow this chapter took longer than expected for such a shitty product. But you know there is more coming, I know now.

Toko grunted. Waking up in the morning was not something she did well. Fatigue snaked around her muscles. Komaru had been brutal this morning, no matter how much she was infatuated with her passion. However, a gentle pair of hands were shaking her shoulders and she couldn't ignore it much longer. She opened her eyes slowly, to see Komaru standing up beside her, arms extended in front of her. Her eyes were smiling when they met Toko's own.

"Hey.. You're awake." Her cheery voice made her smile despite the sleep crusting around her eyes. "Togami needs us to talk with Future Foundation."

Toko shuffled under her covers and straightened her glasses. She felt that she had slept with them on the bridge of her nose. Her feet touched the ground and for the first time, she noticed how worn her stockings were. She also felt something a bit less than dry on the hem closest to the top. Perhaps it would be better to just take them off.

This was the moment she finally realized how little she was wearing. She had never been wearing a bra, to begin with, it now being an optional step most days, and her shirt and panties were nowhere to be seen. At some point, they must have snapped the elastic of her skirt, because the fabric laid in a messy heap where she had previously been laying. Glancing at Komaru, she was still only in her skirt. That skirt that did absolutely nothing to hide the plush thighs beneath it.

She blushed and hurried herself over to the dresser with their few spare clothes. Opening the drawer she scooped out her second uniform and began to dress. Scuffling sounds across the room suggested that Komaru was doing the same.

A few moments of silence passed between the two. The dusty hotel room felt almost desolate, torn between words neither would say.

"I love you."

Komaru's voice echoed in the empty room. Toko felt a chill when she uttered those words. It was almost unexplainable. She knew that she loved Komaru, but why would Komaru ever reciprocate? 

She physically cringed at herself. No, she shouldn't think like that. It was ironic in a way, that it was Komaru's whose voice told her that. They made each other better. Komaru was her missing piece, the thing that filled her heart, that completed her. The person she could trust. Komaru would never hurt her, never disappear from her life. A rock to build and better herself off, and to be a foundation in turn. 

Toko wanted Komaru to be happy. She wanted her to be alive and safe and in her warm embrace on all the cold nights. She did, with all her heart, love her. It was a strange feeling, quite unlike what she had always imagined love to be. And it felt like a dream she never wanted to wake from. A delusion only possible within the confines of her headspace. A relationship not defined by wishful lust but by care, and the special bond the two would never be able to truly break. Even at the lowest moments, they would know the other was there. But how did she say that?

Her ability with words didn't always help her when using them aloud. In truth, it never helped. She knew that if she opened her mouth it would come out a strangled stutter of broken syllables. However, she knew it felt right to say it back.

"I l-love you t-t-too."

She pulled a black sports bra over her head and stuck her arms through the straps. It seemed like Komaru had something more to say. Anxiety made a shiver run up her spine quietly. This morning was passionate and nothing they knew to say could explain what they were thinking. But Toko felt obliged to try anyway.

She took a deep breath and pulled down her bra. "S-so does this m-mean we're…" Toko held her breath, "T-together?"

Komaru let out a strained laugh. "Doesn't it?"

Toko bent to pull up her panties and churned out an uncomfortable response. "I-I-I've n-never got-t-ten to this part." She forced out a giggle at her own expense. It was the truth, however embarrassing. 

She pulled the hem of her underwear up to her hips and let go of a breath she didn't realize she had held. Her instinct wanted to crack, but her mind told her to be brave. Toko wanted to scream into the strenuous tension that staggered in the room. She took a deep sigh and began, "I'm g-glad it c-c-can be with you. And I want us t-to be together b-because you are l-like my," Thoughtfully she paused, "My missing piece. The other half. You complete me."

As she continued her voice hardened with confidence. Her words were certain and she knew she whole-heartedly meant everything she said. "You find the good in me. You make me a better person. And you make this hell of a world so much kinder. Kinder than I realized it could be for a long time." Toko picked up her folded shirt and ran her fingers over it absently. "I want to be that person for you."

She heard Komaru laugh, a disconsolate, melancholy sound. Her shoulders stiffened. People laughing at her, making fun, ridiculing her mercilessly for her purest expression of emotions. However, she banished the reaction. Komaru meant no wrong. "You already are, Toko." She paused to pull her bra around her back. "You've made me strong. Given me the courage to fight. If it weren't for you, I don't think I'd be alive, Toko," She sniffled like she was crying. 

Toko whirled around to face her. Her face was hidden in her hands, shaking and sobbing quietly. Toko quickly walked over to her and then stopped. She extended her arms awkwardly to her backside. Wrapping Komaru into a hug, she murmured, "What's wrong?"

Komaru shook her head. "No, no, no no. Toko I'm just," she laughed solemnly, "I just can't believe I ever helped you as much as you did. I've only ever felt like a burden to you. On the receiving end. Hell Toko, you've said it yourself. I'm glad I can reciprocate… if that makes any sense." Her words resonated in Toko's chest. The feeling she could empathize well. Unconditional love that you understand won't ever be returned. That makes you feel incredulous for even feeling it. But this was catatonically different. 

For one, they both loved each other.

Toko loosened her grip and turned Komaru around by her shoulders. Their eyes met, desaturated, dusty green glittering illustriously. Her brow was creased, furrowed in weary frustration. Shoulders hunched and tensed, she seemed wiry and small. She coiled her arms around Toko, attempting to burrow her way into her shoulder. Toko found herself dumbly unable to do anything more than stroke her matted hair faintly. Komaru's tears fell on Toko's skin, rivulets trickling down before soaking into the fabric of her bra. Many heartbeats stretched to minutes, the girls accepting their place in silence. Warm, accepting silence. Much unlike the strain of earlier's most awkward rambles. 

Yes, this was different.

This moment, this encapsulated the vehemence that was at the essence of every word she wrote. 

Love.

Komaru weakly drew herself up and stifled. She looked into Toko's eyes and whimpered, no louder than am inky quill writing on paper, "I love you."

Toko unfurled herself from Komaru's body. "I love you too." Her voice came out quiet and composed. Because she knew what the words meant. She knew exactly what to do, though she had never done it before. Toko thought her lack of experience might become a hindrance, but right now, it told her perfectly what to do. To be genuine.

Komaru kissed her softly on the cheek, before turning back to her clothes and continuing to dress. Toko returned to her own and did the same, but no amount of clothes on her body could conceal the frolicsome fuschia's stark contrast on her porcelain complexion.

***

Komaru and Toko walked down the hallway silently, their fingers intertwined with a mutual unspoken agreement. Toko thought Komaru seemed suspiciously unabashed, however, she coquettishly diminished the idea. Her mind was racing, taking in new factors she had once eliminated from her processing of the situation. Most prominently, Togami. At one point, Toko could've said with certainty she loved him to the end of the world. Although now, it was the end of the world, and the once-thriving if one-dimensional relationship seemed trivial. What would she have to say to him, or perhaps nothing at all would be more appropriate? Mayhaps a compact minute explanation would fit?

It boggled her how inconceivable the idea of living without him was, despite how little she truly wanted him. Her mind wandered back to its own previous musings; imaginings of harsh and painful "discipline". More often than not, she had realized, Togami was on the receiving end of these wounds. She squeezed Komaru's hand tighter and hoped the wait would be over soon.

It wasn't a long time before Komaru had led them to Byakuya's room. She glanced over to Toko before she knocked. Toko's worry must have told on her face. Or Komaru really just knew her that well. "It's gonna be okay," She said softly, a fondly caring smile instilling comfort in her heart.

Toko giggled sheepishly. "Yeah... I know it will." Her own voice's confidence didn't match her own. But persevere, she must.

Byakuya answered the door almost immediately following Komaru's rhythmic knocks. He looked annoyed, arms folded in aggravation. "The call was supposed to start 7 minutes ago. And that's an hour later than scheduled, thanks to you bumbling idiots."

Komaru gathered an innocent retort, "That's mean!"

Byakuya rolled his eyes dismissively and gestured them inside. Toko watched his gaze flicker ever quickly to their hands clasped together. Judgment suddenly darkened his gaze, or perhaps it was surprise. Toko couldn't decipher which. 

The room was identical to her own, two large beds, a bathroom, with no amenities having had been in working order for much too long. The younger girl led her to take a seat on the bed closest to the door. It appeared to have been untouched by Togami. The second had been seemingly made hurriedly, faster than eloquent Byakuya would have done anything. The dark-colored Future Foundation computer was untouched on the center before Byakuya picked it up. But Toko didn't have much time to question unimportant details.

Byakuya sat himself on Toko's side, placing Toko in the center of the three. He placed the laptop on her thighs, making his hand press against her panties when he worked the touchpad. Despite her affections toward Komaru, Byakuya doing something this simple made her blush. She didn't wish it to be, in fact, it would've made everything easier if it hadn't. Out of the corner of her eye, jealousy flared on Komaru's expression.

Suddenly, the screen lit up in green-blue haze. The face of none other than Makoto greeted them. Byakuya drew back his hand and greeted him. "Future Foundation, 14th division."

Makoto wearily chortled, "Great to see you too Byakuya."

Komaru grinned, cheery and grateful. "Glad to see everything's going well over there!"

Makoto replied, "Yeah! Me and Kyoko have managed. But I'm more concerned about what's happening there." Obviously, he was referring to the assignment the three had just returned from. Like all of their missions since being station in Towa City, for the time being, it had been tiring and loathsome. But inside they all knew the greater good in the situation was to help the recovery of the island. Rehabilitating children and adults alike. Why had they stayed here if not to aid? 

Toko finally added to the conversation, "Everything went fine. The central riot we addressed is now in progress toward repair. There were minimal casualties. Kotoko agreed to be on friendly terms with us as we locate the rest of the former Warriors of Hope." It almost chilled her, the utter lack of emotion in her voice after many months of referring to the deceased as mere 'casualties'. It left the taste of contempt in her mouth. "We haven't found Monaca since she escaped."

Makoto nodded and smiled his hopeful smile. "I'm glad to hear you're all okay! And that Future Foundation doesn't have any assignments for you. You all are instructed to…" He glanced down at something in his hands off-screen "..rest and recuperate from any sustained injuries. But when they put it like that it sounds kinda depressing. So, just relax for a while! I don't know when you'll get the opportunity again."

Byakuya looked like he had a scathing remark prepared, only to be promptly interrupted by Komaru. "We'll take it easy."

Makoto glanced toward something off-screen. "Ah, It's almost time for me to leave… I guess we'll talk later."

Byakuya curtly replied, "I apologize for having had pushed back the call." Komaru's hands curled into aggressive fists. 

However, Makoto seemed generally unphased, chuckling, "I understand. Rest is important! Just try to be up earlier next time." He shuffled with things next to the computer before adding, "I really should get going. I'll talk to you all later."

"I love you!" Komaru squeaked with innocent exuberance.

Very suddenly, before Makoto could even have responded, Byakuya snapped the laptop shut. Toko jumped at the sharp movement, her head swiveling around to meet a pair of glowering pewter eyes. "Allow me to cut to the chase," He spat, gaze locked on the brunette beside her, "What exactly happened between the two of you last night?" His growl was gravelly and molten.

Komaru's response was defensive and irate, "Why do you wanna know?" Toko cringed at her unthoughtful transparency.

Byakuya looked uneasily malcontented under the shear of vex. Like the question was one of which he couldn't solve himself. But nevertheless, he choleristicly hissed, "I think you know what obviously happened there was," He paused with nauseous confliction, "Unprofessional conduct. This is a workplace of the Future Foundation's 14th division-"

Abruptly, Komaru cut him off. "Neither Toko or I work for Future Foundation. Thanks to you, anyway. And, we don't even sleep on the same floor as you."

Byakuya looked like a child on the verge of a tantrum. Toko felt strangely liberated by the man so vulnerable. How did she allow him to abuse her the way he did? Moreover, why did she so forcibly convince herself she enjoyed it?

Byakuya seemed like he had been swiftly defeated, however, the progeny had proven himself stubborn as a whiny child. He stood to face both of the girls. "I think we can agree that was grossly inappropriate." The two's back and forth seemed a meticulously malicious game of chess. So elegantly perfected and honed. Yet chaotic with the melancholy of humanity's overwhelming emotions.

Komaru shot up as well, and snapped back, "Hah! You say that like you're jealous, Togami."

He flinched, obviously the remark hitting him too desperately close to home. Though his reaction was perplexing, to say the least. Was it actually out of jealousy? Or perhaps something Toko hadn't completely considered. Maybe even homophobia. The thought them together was gay and therefore "wrong" hadn't even crossed her mind. So caught up in the moment, in a fantasy come true, the exterior she'd made had unraveled all around her. Even her quick tongue disintegrated around this girl. It made her so wondrously helpless. She cowered quaintly further back onto the bed, hoping to be forgotten. Her legs folded underneath her, arms clutching her chest.

"What exactly do I have to be jealous of here?" He posed a defensive play.

Komaru paused, seething with boiling putrid pitch. "I don't know! Perhaps you don't like your personal whipping bitch being happy!?" Her arm snapped extended to point. "It's not like you love her! You can't even treat her like a human being, Byakuya. And yet your tiny little brain can't handle someone who does." She relaxed her arm to her side and huffed, straightening her rumpled skirt. It folded askew from sitting on the bed. Any moment it seemed as if her composure might snap, like a violent twist could possibly tear through the stale, scary morning.

Toko was aghast by the anger in her voice. It seemed impossible that that spark was lit by her. It almost seemed too idealistic, having someone care that much about her. Care enough to yell about someone mistreating her. Enough to holler out their declaration of love.

Byakuya seethed with unadulterated hatred. His face was red-hot and envious. In all the time she'd known him, Toko had never seen him like this. "I-" He stopped himself short. "Can I talk to Toko alone?" He hissed quickly. Arms folded across his chest he growled the final word almost to himself.

Komaru's face relaxed from its bitter scowl. She stepped back toward the bed and squeezed her hand. Her face was suddenly gentle when it turned to her. It asked, so kindly for an answer. 

"O-okay.."

She looked disappointed but she prayed for Komaru to be courteous. She left the room quietly, footsteps echoing in the oppressive wait, the tension so silent you could hear the door click. 

Byakuya's eyes met hers. For many moments they stared before anyone spoke. She studied his gaze, pools of anger, and something softer. Something she rarely saw in his eyes, the look that seemed a much better fit in Komaru's. 

"Byakuya-"

"Toko what happened? What happened to your incessant and indecent delusions of me? To suddenly drop all feelings for me?"

Toko froze, carefully pondering her answer. She didn't quite have one. 

She started slowly. "W-well, I th-think we both know that it wasn't r-really a r-relationship." Toko twisted the ribbon of her uniform. Her stutter started to wane. "I had to r-realize that some time." Looking at Byakuya's face became painful as it lost color and intensity. She looked down like an ashamed child. However, the memories she had managed to recover from her time at Hope's Peak weren't very pretty. Rather unsightly. She knew for a fact the old Togami had hit her at least once. A vague and frosted picture of remembrance that shook her every time, the concerning discoloration of her arm. The deep contrast of bruise to milky pale. Nothing else that day ever came to her. Perhaps it was circumstantial, or that's what she liked to think. No matter how much she tried to tell herself she enjoyed it, she craved it, nothing could be further from the truth. No person could want that.

No one.

Everyone deserves better.

Down to her blood she felt cold as a shiver ran through her.

"And I love Komaru. Really love. Not just a wistful imagining of love. A relationship… that's all I've wanted Byakuya. And with her, it's so much more than I've imagined." Her thoughts ran wild with memories of the two talking at night, exhausted from the day. Memories of simply enjoying the feeling of not being alone. So much joy in those memories. Ones that were truly her own, not ones dug up from her dark, fermented ruins of Hope's Peak Academy.

After a lasting moment, she finally finished, "And I've never really had that with you."

Inexplicably, Byakuya quieted. He looked almost lost, drowning in despair. A short time ago it would've broken her heart. But this man had hurt her so much. It gave her closure to speak her feelings to him directly. 

His voice sounded like a hoarse whisper, "I see." His dignity and pride seemed shattered like cathedral glass art, fractaling into sharp-edged thorns and stabbing through the poor man. It didn't make any sense to her. Toko knew he voiced his opposition to her boastfully. Why did it bother him that she moved on? Shouldn't he be ecstatic? 

"It seems I had developed stronger feelings for you than I had anticipated. I'm ashamed that I let myself act this way." His cheeks turned a much softer pink than they were before. He cleared his throat before adding, "I can assure you I have no prejudice against you two." 

Speaking the way he did rubbed her the wrong way. Almost uncomfortable. Like attempting to convince himself, however, Toko forbade herself from voicing her opinion. She simply nodded and whispered, "Thank you."

Byakuya took a deep breath. Toko mustered her courage to collect herself. The progeny raised his voice, "You can come in again."

The door slowly creaked open, Komaru peering from behind it. Her face was flushed and genuinely relieved. Toko knew she had listened. Though she could've guessed beforehand, anyways. The youngest girl shuffled over to Toko and rigidly turned to face Byakuya.

Byakuya almost had enough pride left to turn his nose up to Komaru's expectant eyes. 

Almost.

"I apologize for the way I acted." The word apologize was purely soaked with juicy venom. 

Komaru looked at him, almost with sad endearment. No, pity.

She was looking at him with pity in her eyes.

Quietly, she said, "Thank you Byakuya." Her eyes were melting down from their scorching anger. They were soft and round again, expansive and naive. Viridescent and bewitching. Alluring, irresistible, magnificent, winsome were all words that came to mind. And she had trouble focusing on much else. 

Toko felt overwhelmingly embarrassed. She wanted to just go back to sleep. To pretend this morning never happened. "I-I think we can take our leave." Komaru took her hand quietly and together they left for the door.

  
  


***

Byakuya was sitting by the window. It was cold outside, the chilly September air bit at his fingers. 

Toko… didn't love him? He knew he wasn't always the kindest, but he had always assumed she had understood his inability to tell her that. He did, ipso facto, adore her incessant delusions, her unique attributes. Her work as the Ultimate Novelist was well respected enough to put her at a social class acceptable to him. Her work as a person put her at a very content place in his heart. Every unsightly quirk was what made her Toko. And he willed himself to disappear. His own shortcomings bit him in the ass.

He stared out at the wreckage town as he thought. It gave him back his ever wistful hopes of reversing every snarky comment, every scathing insult he'd burned into her mind. 

Couldn't he rewind the months, hell the years? 

He thought of before the killing game. What little of the time he remembered. How he had… how he had done that to her. It felt like an icicle stabbing him from front to back. The image of a broken bottle, a purple-blue bruise. He hated himself for it. Could she possibly remember it too? It wasn't like he had a choice. Although she would never possibly understand. Muddled memoirs of murky memories make for misunderstandings. He would never have done what he did.

He would have never done what he did.

Never never never never never never never never.

He wished he never did.

He wished she never did.

The periwinkle haze outside was blinding. His tortured mind was running as his eyes followed every individual snowflake fall to the cracked pavement.


	3. Melancholy Overcompensation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toko would love some help.
> 
> Does Komaru have the moral obligation to help her?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I might be deciding to make this a serious book
> 
> (I did?)
> 
> I have a plot and stuff it's pretty cool. There will be more, I promise. 
> 
> This one is pretty much entire smut though, but trust me it serves the plot and overall theme later.

Towa City was cold and sleeping. The witching hour was upon them. Not a sound echoed through the quiet town, every adult, child, and Monokuma laying at rest. Toko felt astronomically alone. But cuddling in Komaru's arms felt like the last drop of comfort, unbeknownst to the city.

Toko felt strangely uncomfortable despite this. Thoughts filled her head that were not welcome. Thoughts of Komaru, with herself. Wild, breathless images, vivid beyond her farthest delusions. Hot, syrupy, liquored, and slicked. Maybe even Komaru's eyes rolling up into her skull as Toko…

_ No, stop that. _

She forced out all imaginings of inappropriate scenarios. Komaru was sleeping so peacefully. She didn't want to wake her. But the burning yearning feeling in her stomach carried on. The writer's mind was used to dreaming such lewd unashamedly quite regularly. The unusual use of constraint made her body tighten and knot. Toko was determined to keep her sense of reality in this relationship. 

She had to learn. Learn from Togami and move on with her life. To understand the difference between love and lust. She always seemed to blur that line in her head. But that wasn't what she wanted in this relationship. If anything, Toko could be absolutely sure of that. She wanted a fluffy, cute, lovey-dovey novel, where the ending is cheesy and predictable and everyone is happy.

It reminded her of the first book she ever wrote. Toko's writing was not spectacular back then. However she'd never be content with her work anyway. But alas, something had been different in this book. It was a story of a couple who met at a coffee shop. Now, she saw it as a cliche, but her writing-prodigy title wasn't irreputable. Every chapter, the book switched between describing both character's dark, twisted story of the character's life. They were deep, real problems, not the fantasy backstories of Tumblr OCs.

But every chapter, it ended with a small scene of the couple brightening their counterpart's day. It told the story of how people's small thoughtless actions have so much influence over people's emotions.

That novel had been very close to Toko. Many times she had wished people could take the important lesson. Perhaps it hadn't really been as clear as she thought it was. Toko had pleaded so often for someone to shine a light in her world. And though it took the universe many, many years to achieve it, it finally gave her someone. Someone to talk to in (albeit abandoned) cafes, about everything she wanted to get off her chest. Toko had needed this relationship her whole life. And needed to keep Komaru safe. Like an instinct, second nature now, to protect her, despite how she'd protest. She'd really grown so much, still so lovable. 

Their relationship was so sweet, such a fluffy ending. Holding hands, kissing her gently on the cheek when they woke up, and when the day was over and her head felt too heavy for her neck. Such an innocent and fulfilling thing, warming her heart lovingly.

Yet the thoughts plagued her. It was ironic that her brain still felt the incessant need to spite her once again. She thought of Komaru pulling her hair and biting her neck, softly at first, but getting harder every time. Hitting her deepest points, making her legs twitch obscenely and her head go silly. Her pussy dripping wet and fucked delirious. 

"Ugh!" She groaned in frustration. Toko buried her face into Komaru's embrace. She was an ambient warmth, but Toko felt like she was being boiled alive. Despite her restless squirming and wriggling, the feeling didn't let up.

Suddenly, Komaru began to stir.  _ Dammit! Good job, Toko!  _ she scolded herself. 

Her green eyes lazily opened, fluttering to adjust to the sheer, translucent moonlighting. Komaru timidly whispered, "Toko?" It was a meek question, sweet and drowsy.

Toko now felt the burning sensation spread up her neck. "Sorry I'm just r-restless," She mumbled.

Komaru shifted, propping herself up onto the pillow to face her. "What's wrong?" She murmured gently. Her voice was her natural, rich, alto she barely used when wide-awake. Toko loved that voice, robust and commanding. It made her so surreptitiously wet. Her face felt hot with an embarrassed blush.

Toko bit her lip with scandalous intent. "Just…" She sighed lascivious, "Frustrated." Komaru's eyes looked lustful and she felt salacious. The strain in her lower torso pulled taut against her.

Komaru smiled endearingly. "You can tell me anything Toko, you know that," She sweetly whispered. Her arms slipped around Toko carefully. 

Toko was reluctant. Komaru was her girlfriend, yes, but it didn't mean she could just request sex. That's a sleazy online novella plot, not a real-life scenario. Nevertheless, her explicit horniness was much stronger than her hesitation. "I'm thinking of you.." She whispered, giggling softly before continuing, "...and me."

Komaru's grinning chuckle followed her own. "Yeah?" She purred beguilingly.

Weakly, Toko swallowed. "Doing some things…" She breathed in harshly, "Together." 

Komaru blinked in jolt. She took a thoughtful moment, searching Toko's glassy silver eyes as they searched her's. Flirtatiously, Komaru's arm snaked up her back, drawing them tantalizingly close. "You could've told me that. There's something I can do about that." Her voice was sultry and compelling, pulling Toko close to her.

Toko's entire body was brightly ignited with fire. She needed this girl right fucking now. Hungrily, she kissed Komaru, immediately twisting her fingers into her silky hair. She probably took Komaru by surprise, but she didn't mind, gluttonously tasting as much of her as she could. Ravenous tongues twirled with incredible passion. Komaru's hands left her upper back, running down to her ass. She pulled their lower bodies into each other, insatiable heat radiating between them. Toko tenderly moaned into her velvety lissom lips. 

Suddenly, she felt herself being pushed against the bed. Komaru's powerful grip turned her backwards, her elbows sinking into the lackluster pillows, as she used them to pose herself upright. The pillows made her think about how much more plush and opulent Komaru's thighs felt. She took over as the dominant initiative, taking her hands from Toko's lower half and delicately caressed her waist. Komaru pulled away, lickerishly breathing, "Were we doing things…" she sensually moved backwards until her head was lewdly close to her pussy, discarding all of the thin blanket to the floor, "Here?"

Squirming in anticipation and impatience, Toko nodded feverishly. Komaru's swift switch to a provocative persona seemed out of place. And Toko bathed in the amorous attention. Lithe fingers played with her skirt, gingerly peeling down the constricting elastic. After many teasing moments of striping her down, Komaru threw the lengthy skirt toward the rumpled comforter. Warm fingers lento stroked her hoary cotton panties. It matched the melody of her voice, a hushed, reposeful moan, spurred by utter gratification. Her dirty mind knew no bounds as it exploded with frenzy. She was so worked up with desire she thought she would cum on the spot.

Komaru's fingers tugged on the lower hem of her panties, pulling it aside to reveal just how wet she'd become, purely, or rather impurely on thoughts of her. The brunette didn't take time for the flattery. She lowered her head to lap up the succulent taste. Her tongue traced over her clit. It ran down her drenched slit with sharp avidity. The feeling was zealously exquisite.

With kind restraint she pushed her tongue in. Her assiduity made Toko's head blurry, swirling to touch every sensitive nerve in her entrance. She coiled and tightened around Komaru's deft tongue. Komaru raised her arm over Toko's legs to use her fingers to service her. She pulled out her tongue, planting passionate kisses down her inner thighs while her fingertips rubbed over her clit. Every nerve was tingling with delightful jubilation where she touched. A dragging, mellow moan left her lips, "OohhHhh!" It echoed ever perfectly off the walls. Her abdomen felt strained with anticipation. She had to be extremely close already. 

Komaru suddenly switched her tongue and her fingers. She kissed her clit with affectionate adorn. Her fingers meticulously pumped shallowly into her sopping wet pussy. Toko groaned, begging Komaru to go harder, or at least a little faster. Her deliberateness was ultimately unnecessary. Though it seemed her prayers had been answered.

Komaru's middle and ring fingers thrust into her, at least succumbing to her knuckles. It caught Toko off guard, and it seemed that was probably her goal.  _ Payback. _ She wailed out, "Komaru!" In genuine overwhelm. But she didn't have time to relish in awe before the brunette began repeatedly curling her fingers up, directly into her g-spot. She wailed in an infatuated soprano, melting into the fiercely intoxicating situation.

For many minutes Komaru's fingers fucked her wildly, slowly building up intensity and speed, and then dropping to a halt, gently pumping in and out as deep as possible. It hit her in waves, and everytime Toko was certain she was close, it teased her mercilessly. She would then gradually pick up her pace once again. Her head was loling with thick, dream-like euphoria. 

Suddenly, Komaru's movements spiked, the tallest peak of the night so far. Her fingers were deeper, her thrusts rapid. 

"AAAAAHHHhh!~" 

Toko lost her semblance of reality for many heartbeats. All she saw was pure and blank, vastly expansive sparkling light. Sticky cum squirted all over the sheets, all over her legs. And most importantly, all over Komaru's hand. Komaru kept moving, every few seconds beckoning more gushing brackish cum.

Toko breathed raggedly, gasps and whimpers intruding haphazardly. Her gaze slowly adjusted to the twilit, steamy bedroom. Komaru glanced up to her with a cheeky grin. "I'm assuming we aren't done yet?" She took her arm and lovingly stroked Komaru's fleecy green-brown hair.

It took a few moments for her to muster the breath to retort, "Not even close."

An excited smile spread across Komaru's face, cutting sharp against the rosey blush. She pulled herself up to Toko's face, kissing her with passionate avarice. Toko's hand trailed down to her cheek, the tepid skin against her palm filling her with affection. Komaru's hand was still south, pulling Toko's panties away from her body. Her hands were rough and calloused where her palms gripped the hacking gun. When rough work was afoot Komaru was always given the shortest stick. Byakuya had no interest in getting his hands dirty, and she was much physically stronger than Toko, herself. Since they'd been in Towa, Toko noticed them get harder and smoother everytime they held hands. But like magic they were silk on her skin. She pulled her knees up to her body, as to let her toss them to the ground. Her legs wound around Komaru happily, purring into plump, shiny lips.

Komaru's fingers tested her slick entrance, not daring to break her passionate and intense eye contact. She slipped in with pleasant ease. Throwing caution to the wind, fingers began moving with consuming fire, picking up her previous pace. Rapture was ablaze quickly through her once again. Toko was bashful of her strepitous voice, overindulging in the pleasure. Delight pushed her soaring high, a high from which she didn't want to ever come down. 

Toko knew she was yelling. And although she knew she was yelling, utter lack of control of herself didn't let her do anything about it. 

Komaru's hand was now moving in and out with ease. A third finger now thrust with the others. It hit her in every possible place she'd ever dreamed. For a moment she pulled out, shuffling back towards where she had been before, taking up workload with her tongue. Her fingers didn't waste time to start up again. Toko wondered if she'd ever felt this wet before, or even as exhilarated. 

The green-haired girl's head moved with rhythm. Her mouth was hot and sloppy, tongue-fucking her clit beautifully. Toko's hand left the sheets to bury in her hair, clawing into the fluffy locks eagerly. Komaru was truly the most amazing at this. Every perfected thrust, hitting her with impactful pleasure. She felt it in every fiber of her being, expending overloading delight. Her legs were all but tied around Komaru's head, toes curling in relish.

Komaru suddenly stopped, pulling out sensually and licking up the liquid on her lips. "Ooh.." Toko trailed off, heavy with disappointment.

"No, don't worry; I just remembered something." Toko relaxed her legs to let Komaru free. She pushed herself up and heaved off the bed. The springs creaked loudly. Had the bed been squeaking before? Toko couldn't say.

Komaru walked to the dresser in quick strides, pulling out a drawer and picking something out from inside. Toko's hand was toying with her clit impatiently.

Komaru first took off her skirt, Toko could tell that. And she heard what she knew was velcro. But in the dark and without her glasses she couldn't exactly see what was happening. A solid minute of awkward, blind struggling and she audibly sighed with relief. Toko had to stifle a laugh.

The brunette climbed back onto the bed, arching over top of her. Toko felt something solid rubbing against her entrance, and gasped in surprise. "Where'd you find that?"

"Heh… I sneak off sometimes," she snickered. Carefully, Komaru pushed the tip in. It was an odd position to move in, Toko could tell. It hit her uncomfortably, not sliding in like her fingers had. She grunted quietly, throwing her hand up and gripping the sheets next to where the younger girl's arm was stiff. "Sorry," Komaru mumbled softly.

She took a few tries going in and out to get into a comfortable movement. Her thrusts gradually got more precise and natural. Toko felt her arouse bubbling back up to the surface, hot fire burning from her center. Everytime she thrust her mouth hung open once again.

When Komaru had adjusted to her rhythmic movements, Toko wrapped her legs around her back. "Aah! Yes! Fuck, oh my god!" Nonsensical music poured from her unadulterated lips. Yes, surely the best at this. She had to be. Nothing else in the world could make every part of her so greedy. 

Her metronome suddenly turned methodical, but not exactly slow. A reasonable pace, as though to pad the scene's runtime, or work Toko gradually. It was a cheap tease but it worked like a charm. Toko felt as though her body was begging for her, pleading for a sultry sweet release.

"Pleeeaase Komaruuuu," She moaned, dragging every syllable like a pen puddling ink at the end of a thoroughly scrawled and scratched sheet of paper. Komaru didn't respond, instead slightly hastening and smirking mischievously. 

Her voice sounded as innocent and unassuming as the day they met. "Please what?"

Toko clasped her legs tighter. "Uuugh! Please-!" She struggled with words, and any other time it'd been as per usual. "Please fuck me!" 

Komaru buckled down, hurriedly thrusting exactly where Toko needed it. It hit her deep and powerfully, absorbing her mind in ecstasy.

She felt so tight, almost impossibly so. And she felt… warm. Komaru's body with her own was a delicious sensation. It was a peaceful moment of clarity, crystalline and joyous while passion and fervor shook the bed; It was definitely creaking now. A moment where she understood where on the fine line of love and lust stood. And understood where she had been standing, without as much as a faltering flicker of doubt. She was exactly where she wanted to be, and where it worked for both her and Komaru. 

Exactly on the fine line, drawn in jet black ballpoint pen. 

Toko's grasp was taut on Komaru's hair, perhaps worrisome. Her overjoyed moans escalated to the top of her scale, shouting, "AhH! Fuck! Komaru! Yes!" Or some rhapsodic spruik of the sort. It was ravishing and ravaging and she felt blissful. Really fucked entirely delirious, exactly as she had craved. Her thoughts were jumbled and rambling. All she was sure of was Komaru's name, replaying the elegant word over and over as she began to descend. The tapering high of euphoria made her dizzy. Her lips curled into an elated smile, eyes solely focused on the intense stare of Komaru's, savoring the look on her face. Toko could only imagine what she looked like. Any feeling this incomparable could make even herself beddable.

Toko's chest heaved, hair messily spread on the mattress. Easeling herself upward slightly had been entirely abandoned, eyes staring up toward the ceiling. Though it wasn't like she could see the ceiling. She only saw heaven. Komaru had left the sheets, tearing straps and drawers moving in the background. Sweat was sticky underneath her shirt and brow. Her eyes only slowly began to adjust. 

Komaru had laid down beside her, sitting up against the headboard to her right. Her hands were playing with Toko's hair, lovingly stroking her head as she recovered. Her voice was a gentle whisper, "Are you feeling better now?" 

Light with humor, Toko's lips curled into a smile. She shuffled to her right, laying herself in between Komaru's legs, using her thick thighs as a pillow. Just as soft as she'd imagined. "I love you," she whispered.

Komaru giggled gently, "I love you too."

Toko turned words over in her head. "I'm sorry… you didn't have to do that." She looked up toward Komaru, whose face was gently smiling at her's.

The girl above her just smiled. "You know I enjoy it, too." Her hands played with her hair aimlessly, as she often liked to do, braiding the small sections loosely and unevenly. 

"Of course," she whispered timidly, almost like she didn't want Komaru to hear, "If you ever wanted to be…" Toko's voice trailed off, words implied on their own. 

Komaru gently laughed, brushing the bangs away from her eyes. Contentedly she shushed her, "Shhh… it's okay. You can go to sleep."

_ No,  _ she thought. "But you know, if you want to." Toko murmured.

"Not tonight."

Toko's eyelids already felt heavy. Maybe she'd convince her another night. Wouldn't it be okay to just let it go for tonight?  _ One last thing _ she had to tell her again. "I love you," she mumbled, drowsy and muddled.

She let heavy sleep over take her.

***

Komaru watched her eyes flutter shut, velvet lashes settling as her breathing slowed and steadied. Once again she found herself braiding Toko's luster hair for comfort on a cool, dark night. 

Her mind was whirling around what Toko had said.

She hadn't lied. She did enjoy it. Cause Toko enjoyed it. Wasn't that how it was supposed to be? Wasn't she supposed to think about her? She had been selfish enough. Monaca's entire "character arch" was her self-improvement. Her child's lesson in selflessness. That was what she was supposed to do. Hadn't that been what she had supposed to do?

Thinking about who she was supposed to be ran her in circles often recently. She was pretty sure letting Toko see that weakness wasn't what she wanted to do. But how long could she keep that up? What if that wasn't even the right thing to do? 

Komaru couldn't keep up anymore.

***

Byakuya threw his pillow across the room.

The damn squeaking noise had stopped.

Finally.


	4. Tintinnabulation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This goes from Depression to Fluff so hard it'll give you whiplash. Unless you hate Togami. Which then, you'll enjoy watching him suffer.

Byakuya sighed at the sound of a robotic beeping alarm. It wasn't like it was waking him, he'd been laying here sullenly for hours. It was just annoying.

He pushed himself up to shut off his work phone. The sleek display was glared, though you could see Toko's face just barely. Byakuya hit the off button and started on his routine.

It was clean-cut and precise. He woke up at 6:00 sharp, going to the bathroom to bathe as best as he could in the given conditions. He would then allot himself 5 minutes to check his phone for emails and other miscellaneous things. Granted, cell service didn't much work in Towa, even without the signal jammer in place. But recently, he'd spent more and more time looking at the pictures he had of Toko. It was infuriating.

Why he had such feelings for her, he could not say. Perhaps her begging had got through to him. Perhaps the disgust he verbalized at her was purely theatrical, though he'd never admit it. Perhaps it was a nice feeling to him to be genuinely cared for, to have someone worried over his safety for reasons beyond her selfish personal gain. Why he felt these such feelings, he would not say.

Byakuya didn't spend all those five minutes today. He rose autonomously, changing and composing himself without much thought. Today was another day of danger. The prior week's rest had been an unaffordable luxury anyway. The two upstairs still had more Monokumas to take care of, stragglers hoarding in mobs, still potent, justified threats. They didn't have time to act so… promiscuously. Yes, that was exactly what bothered him about it. Along with rehabilitation efforts, that had been most of their job since they got here. Byakuya had chosen to help them, though never disclosing why exactly he had decided on practical suicide. 

After he had gussied up for no person, nobody, and no one, he maintained his own little lie. Walking down the flights of stairs quietly, bringing enough essentials to seem like he was living someplace with him. He opened the door to the first-floor suite he'd told them he was staying in, arranging his belongings in convincing enough places, fluffing the bedspread poorly to simulate that he had slept in it the night before. 

As much as Byakuya could convince himself it was harmless, he didn't always believe it. It was deceitful at best and a paranoia-driven breach of privacy at worst. Though he didn't mean to spy. Merely to hear what they'd say to each other when he wasn't around. The thought was shameful, running through his mind despite his attempts to flatten it.

Byakuya plopped on the bed with a disappointing thud. He put his face in his hands silently. What had he stooped to? A replica of Toko herself, at one point. But now it felt out of place. As if he should be moving on with his life, not blocked by a monumental hurdle, that every attempt at jumping resulted in an unruly face-to-concrete impact. Yes, that was the correct analogy. Smacking his face on cold, hard, wet, concrete. A wealthy, powerful and cruel Togami, losing something (he believes he should've needed in the first place) important to him to an unsightly, sheltered, and ridiculously naive girl who never completed middle school. It was ludicrous. It shouldn't happen. It breaks the fundamental laws of space and time.

He couldn't have been sitting in solitude long before there was an obnoxiously rhythmic knock on the door. Quarter note Eighth note Quarter note. Komaru had assigned them the code, much to Byakuya's revolt. It would only be necessary if other people in the city even had an idea of where they stayed. 

"Come in," He barked. 

The door clicked and squealed when it swung open. Komaru stepped inside, her cheerful smile noisome as ever. Toko stood behind her, hiding behind her hair. Her white bobby pins were intricately placed in a small plait, dangling tautly from the right side of her head. It reminded him of Kyoko almost and had almost certainly done by Komaru. No way Toko's fumbling hands could've twisted something so… elegant. Byakuya squinted as more details came to his focus. Not only did her hair flaunt a braid, but it was also unusually clean looking. It looked freshly washed, detangled and soft. Silky almost. Her spiked cowlick wasn't sprouting up, either. 

He cleared his throat, diverting his eyes. 

"Good morning Byakuya!" Komaru was just as chipper as she looked. "Up and ready?"

"Of course I am," He snapped back, "Some people know what a morning routine is." He folded his arms. It wasn't like they were particularly late for anything. Byakuya was just particularly inpatient. The only thing they'd be doing today was the rounds through the city, and an outlasting appointment to destroy remaining Monokuma's, bringing needed supplies to and from. It wasn't especially challenging work, but one wrong move and a lot of dreadful things could happen, and not doing it at all could kill many.

Komaru snickered, entirely ignoring his poor attitude. "Then we should get going." Her hands were firmly clasped around the hacking gun, fingers ready to move to the trigger. She looked so confident. What was she so confident in? She was essentially a doofus with a lethal weapon. 

Komaru's arm looped around Toko's and pulled her down the hallway. Byakuya

followed them with something less than enthusiasm. He let the door slam behind him apathetically. 

It was just a single flight of stairs to the once-grand glass doors. It consisted of tall structural wood beams, ebony and glossy, with fuschia-painted crystalline panels. The glass had shattered, and the varnished rubbed dull and bare, long before they'd settled there. Komaru was the one who had painstakingly picked up every sharp fractal and shard from the carpets. Byakuya still didn't know why. She hadn't put it back together, and she had practically pled with him not to throw them out. He could only imagine what rubbish statue she had constructed to gift to Toko, and Toko would tell her she loved it, and that the thought was what counted, and Komaru would pretend to be mad and then they would cuddle together until they fell asleep.

Byakuya shook the thought from his mind. He pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose absently, staring below the frames toward the ground, following the girls out of the heavy splintered doors. It felt better to not be looking at their blinding happiness.

White flurries speckled the stone-grey sky outside, floating down with halcyon onto the empty streets. It blanketed the pavement with a thick layer of snow. Byakuya trudged ahead, leaving the other two chattering away on the front steps. They had paused, admiring the frost. He didn't waste such time.

Why would they be standing dumbly in the frigid cold? It was late December. If they circled the city now, they could laze about all they wanted, and in a heated hotel. Maybe there was a reason the children called her "Slowpokemaru". It almost made him snicker. The kids may be sinister but they weren't wrong in that idea. 

One foot in front of the other, blocking out the world around him. Isolating himself in his mind. He thought he had a sharp, brilliant mind. It was his heart that was the problem. It wasn't correctable, it wasn't analytical, it wasn't sensible. It was distracting, in the way. His heart was trying to sabotage him with foreign emotions over a woman who had moved on. Turmoil boiling, confined to the bursting walls of himself. Never a way he thought he'd describe love. He never thought he would have to describe love. Although there was another part of him that was certainly more annoying, and it also gave him feelings for Toko, along with some  _ intimate  _ imagery. It was more annoying than Komaru and Toko combined and squared. 

In his tunnel vision, he walked some ways before realizing the girls weren't behind him. He stood, alone in the sheet of white. The ice nipped at his fingers and nose gingerly. He brushed the collecting flurries off of his shoulders. No one was standing anywhere close. The only footprints in sight were his own. Echoes of laughter were carried distantly on the whipping wind. It sounded like a ball of tin foil getting forced down a cheese grater. It had to be Toko's.

Byakuya sighed. His breath fluttered like cigarette smoke in front of his eyes. He continued to walk into the unforgiving cold.

***

Komaru woke up to Toko squirming in her arms. She peeked open her eyes. The older girl was all but laying on top of her, head resting lovingly on her chest. Her arms wrapped around Komaru if pinned underneath her. Her warmth felt safe, assuring. Meant to be, maybe.

She smiled gently. "Good Morning," She whispered.

Toko looked up at her. Her eyes were bleary, glittering silverish violet. They looked so happy. Komaru reached over to the nightstand and handed Toko her glasses. They clattered as she unfolded them. She looked back up to her and smiled. "Good Morning." She punctuated with a dramatically animated yawn. "What time is it?" Her words were drowsy and sweet. 

The clock on her left said 5:34. "We have time to spare." She chuckled softly. Toko pulled herself up, folding her knees underneath herself and sitting up with her hands to her sheets. Last night still resonated in her satisfied, coquettish grin. Her skirt and panties were still unaccounted for. And Komaru herself felt grimy in her shirt. That's a lot more tiring than she thought it'd be. She turned to get off the bed. 

"Where are you going?" Toko's voice sounded less tired now, hinted at annoyed, as usual. Though she wasn't always annoyed. She just sounded like that. It was her signature, perhaps. 

"Just to take a shower." Komaru knew by now that Toko didn't enjoy washing. No matter how much Komaru would protest. "You don't have to take one."

Toko's cheeks looked red. "Maybe I-I could j-join you," She looked down towards the blankets. She was biting her nails nervously. 

Komaru blushed too. She had seriously gotten straightforward recently. "Okay," She shrugged, obviously and obnoxiously unfazed. Pulling Toko's hand away from her mouth she pulled her off the bed and toward their shared bathroom.

"W-wait, Omaru! I-I-" She stuttered and stumbled to her feet.

"Well, you know…" Komaru stopped tugging on her arm and paused. "I know you don't like bathing. And maybe if we do it together you won't be scared." She slid her grip down, holding onto Toko's hand with both of her own. 

Toko furrowed her brows defensively. "That sounds like a thinly veiled argument to shower with me."

"You started it, Toki!" She let herself giggle. Toko pouted mockingly. Komaru pulled her to the bathroom.

The light flicked on, buzzing and flickering to life. She turned the dial on the shower and it rushed from the showerhead. Komaru turned back around to Toko, pulling her close and kissing her tenderly. Neither of them tasted pleasant, but the feeling made her kvell despite it. Komaru guided the older girl's shirt up to her torso. She put up her arms and pulled it over her head. The moment their lips were apart felt lonely. But then Toko was shirtless. And lonely wasn't quite the word for it anymore.

Toko pulled herself off, tugging on Komaru's uniform top. Komaru frowned but let her. She pulled her shirt off, ribbon and all, while Toko folded up her glasses and set them on the sink. Toko naked would never cease to amaze her. She just looked so beautiful. The light of the bathroom painted her skin dandelion. Her curves were slight but perfectly concinnate, her hands smoothing out a skirt that wasn't there. Just esculent, lustrous and scrumptious.

The room felt heavy, steam gathering the longer they waited. "Care to join me?" She giggled, pulling back the muddled taupe shower curtain. It was a bleak color for such a vibrant moment, she thought. They both stepped in, the plastic tub attached creaking underneath their feet. 

Now, only Komaru herself was standing under the water. Toko was only hit with minimal secondhand splashes. It soaked through her hair, drenching her and getting into her eyes. Toko tousled with her bangs, and eventually, they were laying down with the rest of her hair. It tickled.

She laughed.

Toko's nose scrunched up. "What?"

"Haha nothing! It just tickled, Toki," She chirped. The sound reverbed against the fiberglass walls.

Toko still looked troubled. 

"What is it?"

Her shoulders were hunched over like she was embarrassed, tiny beads of water trickling down the frayed ends of her bangs. "C-can I wash your hair?" She asked timidly, fingers pressed together in the flirtatious way she used to when fantasizing about Byakuya. She liked to imagine what the girl's fantasies entailed for her. Washing her hair seemed innocent compared to the rather graphic musing she's explained.

"Of course Toki! Though I do hope I get to wash yours."

She looked annoyed. "Don't ruin this by making me bathe!" But Komaru brushed it off with a laugh. "Turn around." 

Komaru heeded her request and turned around. Her slender hands massaged through her hair carefully, curling and letting the hot water run down her neck. Despite herself, her movements seemed timid, fragile. Like she was afraid of tearing all her hair out of her scalp. But soon enough, she relaxed into more forceful, reassured movements with time. Komaru's shoulders untensed, without her having known they were tensed at all. Suds and bubbles made a soapy trail from her neck far past her toes to the drain. The feeling was  _ intimate _ , she thought, for lack of a better term.

She didn't bother to count the minutes. But she knew it hadn't been enough when Toko told her she was done. 

"All finished," She had said. It was the first sound in those minutes to rise above the droplets pattering loudly onto the floor like heavy raindrops on a rooftop.

Komaru turned around, flashing an excited smile. "Your turn!" She pulled her by the shoulders into the faucet stream. 

"H-hey!" Toko visibly bristled and cringed under the hot water. But she was yet to put up any resistance, resigning to her fate with a sigh as Komaru lathered shampoo in her hands.

Toko hair fell just past the steep round of her hips. Under the water, it could've been misconstrued for jet black. She hadn't brushed it before getting into the shower, and Komaru's hands had to delicately unweave the tangles in portions at a time. However, she didn't mind. It was a frequent reoccurrence now, for Komaru to play with the other girl's hair, whether nervously or fondly. The shampoo smelled harshly and exaggeratedly sweet, like factory, machine-made strawberries. It made her head foggy like the steam had found its way to her brain. 

She had to have seen this in an anime, or maybe read it in a manga. Toko in front of her, partially turned around, looking at her over her shoulder. Totally and completely naked; vulnerable and soft. It used to be something Toko didn't often look like, a rare glance behind the barred exterior. The fragile light in her eyes that was normally hidden behind a scowl. Now it felt perfectly normal, simply a part of Toko that Toko felt comfortable enough to share. Just with her. Perhaps if she had Toko's talent with words she could articulate it better.

She ran her fingers through the mess of hair softly, letting water through every rivulet of her scalp a few extra times for good measure. It took her a considerable amount of time to rinse out all the shampoo, as long and thick as her hair was. The longest Komaru had ever let her own grow out was to her shoulders, and that had been years prior, anyway. It was relaxing, if tedious, running every section thoroughly under the stream. When she was finally done, the water had almost lost its heat.

"Maybe we can do the rest by ourselves… We're running out of hot water." Komaru suggested. Toko turned around, assuming she was done, and mildly annoyed. 

"But what about us being together? Wasn't your plan all along to feel me up?" She said sharply.

Komaru snickered. "I think I did enough of that last night, Toki."

Toko's face went a rich scarlet, before nodding vigorously. "Sounds good to me," She sputtered, grabbing one of their bars of soap. They finished bathing quickly, and uneventfully.

Komaru shut off the water, the old handle squeaking with rust and age as she turned it. She stepped out first, Toko close behind. She handed her one of the snow-white towels from the rack and took the other for herself. Toko's face was such a bright red compared to pale cloth, it was unmistakable. Komaru simply shrugged it off with a stifled giggle. Soon enough they were both dry and left to the bedroom.

The moment the door swung open, Komaru felt the rush of frigid air, and the steam suddenly rushing out from behind her, being swiftly released. It was approaching winter, and the A.C. unit was busted. Though the cold air had never seeped into the apartment this severely. She didn't pay much mind to it and continued toward her dresser to hopefully put on something warm.

Digging through every drawer in the dresser, she finally found what she was looking for. A tan, baggy sweater, and a midnight indigo one to match. She held them up for Toko to see. "I had found these in a store, and as it's getting colder, I thought maybe we can match!" She held out the purple one.

Toko's eyebrows furrowed slightly, before letting out a resigned sigh. "Whatever it takes to keep your dumbass from catching a cold," She hissed, humor tugging up the corners of her mouth despite herself. Their hands brushed against each other when she took it. Funny how magical those bubbles of joy can be, even after you've just taken a shower with one and other. They both started dressing.

This time, the space was silent, though a much more comfortable silence. It was something she tended to notice. Over time, it was the little things that changed. In the beginning, she and Toko would suffer through stagnant rooms, praying that the other would say something to break the air. But it changed. Slowly. They learned to coexist with each other. Completely separate tasks, while still appreciating the other's company. They could focus on something else while still being together. And they weren't exactly avoiding seeing each other dress. It wasn't necessary to try to be together. They were already a "We", a functioning unit. It was perfect harmony. There wasn't anything left to say. Except for one thing of course. 

"I love you," she whispered.

Toko hesitated for only a moment. "I love you too," she sounded relieved that she said it. Komaru was too. It would always be hard for Toko, no matter how far they came together, she understood that. But she did it anyway, even if it was hard. Komaru just smiled lovingly, and even if she wasn't facing her, she knew Toko was too. 

When she finally pulled her sweater over her head, she smoothed it down, admiring the wooly, fleecy knit. It hung over her frame loosely, making her look scrawny in comparison. The perfect fit for any cozy sweater.

She turned to Toko. She was combing out wet tangled tendrils of hair with her finger. Komaru pulled her hands from her hair. "What if I do your hair?" 

Toko looked unsure. "I'm not doing anything fancy. I don't know the last time anyone's done my hair." Despite having found soap and shampoo and a lot of other necessities, a hairbrush was never one of them. Toko's white hairpins were laid on the nightstand. Komaru scooped them up and brought Toko to sit on the bed. 

"C'mon it'll look nice!" She stationed herself behind Toko, legs splayed in a W, with Toko in the crook of her thighs. Her fingers worked through tangles with minimal effort. Nimble fingers could work their magic. Weaving like wicker and working with wondrous focus. 

Soon it was flowing in damp sections, like ribbons of french silk, royal plum in color. She ran her fingers through it once more, taking in how elegant it was. The predawn moonlight shone in lilac highlights. It smelled mild and cleanly, the warm scent of shea butter and coconut. Or the mellow sweet smell of vanilla bean coffee creamer. Nothing like the strawberry smell from earlier washed away and into the drain with flooding water. Maybe she could do something special. Toko had once told her she always braided her hair when she was younger. Komaru had never had long enough hair to do that sort of thing on herself. But when she was a little her Mother would sit with her and teach her how, so she could go to school and do it on the other girls. The memory made her hurt, deep pain and grief that weights in the bottom of your stomach like tar. But then her hands stroked Toko's hair. And her lips curled into a loving smile.

She pulled a portion of her locks aside. Playing with Toko's hair had become a relaxing pastime, but never anything intricate as she'd once learned to do.

Quickly a patterned plait began to take shape, every three cross overs she'd enclose the section with a bobby pin, sliding it into the braid. She wished she had something else, maybe flowers, or some other accent, but the understated simplicity was quite fitting for Toko. In no time she'd tied off the end. She admired her work before standing up and pulling Toko to her feet. "Done!" Maybe not her best work, but framing Toko's face it looked beauteous. 

Toko took the braid between her fingers. She looked confused but impressed. "Where did you learn to do this Omaru?" 

Komaru beamed proudly. "It was always a hobby when I was younger." She pecked her girlfriend on the cheek. Toko's face flushed an epitome rose. "Let's go. We can't be late to annoy Togami," she joked. They held hands as they walked out of the apartment. 

The hallway was such a boring background. She resolved to take the time to think about Toko. As per usual, she was amazing. Her opposite hand was gently twirling the braid, her eyes still tracing every section serenely. Her face was kind, not as guarded ay usual, her eyebrows at ease instead of furrowed and creased. It was rare to see her like this. Peaceful. Untroubled. 

Komaru ducked down to kiss Toko's cheek. Toko suddenly turned towards her in surprise and Komaru's lips caught hers. They stopped in their tracks suddenly. Komaru put her hand on Toko's face, her fingers brushing the rims of her glasses. A fluffy moment became saturated with passion. Where was this passion in the shower earlier?

She didn't think any more about it as Toko filled in the gap between their bodies. She was just short enough to take the smaller position, chin tilting up gently. It wasn't a long kiss. Barely more than a few heartbeats. But when she pulled away, nothing could break the infallible smile on her lips.

Komaru's legs were already tired when they arrived at Byakuya's cave. She wondered if he did anything in there other then scowl and put sticks up his ass. But she was in a good mood today, and she could cheerfully knock on the door in the rhythm of her favorite song. 

One One-Two One  _ Rest _

The lyrics made her think of her brother. Of family. It was comforting, nostalgic.

Byakuya hollered annoyedly for them to come in. She turned the doorknob and it wasn't unlocked. Thus Komaru swung the door open with cutesy gusto. "Good Morning Byakuya! Up and ready?" She giggled at her own girlish play-up of herself. Taking a shower with company hits different, huh?

Byakuya rolled his eyes, pushing his glasses up his upturned nose. "Of course I am. Some people know what a morning routine is." His sharp tongue was greatly labeled irrelevant. Whom in this building was girlfriends with the most ravishing girl in the whole apocalypse? Twasn't Togami.

Besides, there wasn't much especially pressing on the agenda today. "Then we should get going." She was in a hurry to leave. Komaru wanted as much time to spend indoors as possible. Nevermind how utterly  _ depressing  _ it truly felt to be entering Togami's bare-minimum asylum bedroom. He only had the utmost essentials; Computer, Phone, Extra Clothes and an almost entirely frozen plastic water bottle. It was eerily desolate. Each item, wall, and accent was stark white, with exception to the carpet, computer and night tables. How he managed to entertain himself alone here seemed impossible.

Komaru pulled Toko by the arm down the hallway, hand clasped around the handle of her hacking gun. She felt a giddy elation and excitement wrapped around Toko's arm. She was always racing down the halls toward the golden and glorious entryway.

Every time she left the hotel, she was delighted with memories the victorian designed doors held. At one point, the glass panes had shattered. While Byakuya had insisted on cleaning it away for safety purposes, Komaru had collected all the tiny clear pieces and transparent shards of glass. There was a craft that her brother had taught her that the shattered fragments had reminded her of. Where you could paint each piece separately and lay them out like a puzzle very carefully put them back together. Then cover the surface with glue, and flip it over. She had tried to do it as best she can, and cut her hands all over her palms. But when it was done she was so happy. 

She had ended up giving Toko the vibrant mosaic. Komaru had been so proud. Toko had assured her it was mediocre, but blushing the whole time it was presented. And now it was hung above the dresser. She saw it so often it didn't notice it anymore. She wishes she did, though. It was such a pure, contented memory. Toko had told her it looked like a child had made it, scolding her and saying not to steal art from Monokuma Kids. But she told her that she loved it anyways. And then they realized how horribly sleepy they were. And so they cuddled because at the time their AC was on the Fritz and it was cold in their bedroom all the time.

She took one last look at the gallant sable arches and smiled. Even if it was terribly cold and they let every frigid gust of winter wind in the lobby. 

Komaru was the one who led the trio out on the streets. But suddenly she stopped short of the steps. Snowflakes were fluttering down like flakes of heaven. It coated the pavement like powdered sugar. The sky was a flat sheet of stone gray, clouds like an enormous cozy blanket around the entire planet. This white cityscape was surprisingly more comforting than Togami's suite had been.

She squeezed Toko's hand. Her smile was undeniable, and her eyes were bright. It had been so long since it had snowed. Or at least since she'd seen it. She couldn't believe it was already that time of year. It brought back so many memories of her childhood, her and Makoto opening shiny paper packages on Christmas morning. She wondered if she'd ever have a Christmas like that again.

Togami was muttering something as he went on ahead, ignoring them and saying something or another about lollygagging. They ignored him.

They stood, mesmerized by the snow for a long time. The snow was so glittering and beautiful. It made her want to look at Toko. Beautiful things often made her do that. 

She turned, and Toko was already facing her. Her cheeks gingerly spotted a lush pink. She felt warm and tingly. 

Komaru smiled gently. "You know? The snow reminds me of you."

Toko squinted and scowled. "I'm frigid and people don't like me?"

Komaru chuckled, only Toko would jump to that extreme so quickly. "No," She breathed, "Because you're angelic, and make me happy."

Toko's face scrunched and blushed, her eyebrows furrowing as Komaru pecked her on the cheek. Her skin was tepid in the frosty air. It was the center of the winter; the last remaining touch of heat in the stoic, silent, stretching blank slate of snow.

Suddenly, Komaru broke out into a sprint, running into the snow. "H-Hey! Omaru!" Toko hollered, desperately trying to match her quick feet. Snow kicked up when she stepped, sticking to and melting into her worn-thin knee-high socks. She couldn't have cared less. She dove into sharp turns and cramped alleys, all covered in a silver sheet of snow. It had been so long since she'd run just for the hell of it. It felt freeing.

_ Bop! _

A snowball boxed her in the back of the head. She stopped dead in her tracks. She whipped around to see a wheezing, hunched over, out of breath Toko. Toko sputtered, "Komaru! You have to slow down! Why are you running?"

Komaru simply grinned. It was only a moment before giggles started to rise. She bent over in the snow, balling up the cold ice in her hands.

"No. Omaru-"

A snowball hit her square in the face, cutting her short. "Omaru!" She yelped. Toko quickly kneeled to avenge herself.

Soon it became a war.

Or a much more fun, cold, playful kind of war.

Snowballs flew freely, filling the frosty air full of friendly flurries of laughter and fun. Snow stuck to every cross of knit. Their sweaters were damp and bits of ice stuck like fuzzy clumps. Their laughter was uproarious. They made their way through a labyrinth of streets and alleys, ducking and taking cover behind corners and drainpipes. Snow crunched under every hurried heavy footstep. White cotton balls flying overhead, splitting midair like frozen birdshot. Splattering over the wall on impact. 

Eventually, Komaru finds herself in a corner. She ran down an alleyway where an air conditioner unit was obstructing the way. Toko was getting closer, her steps crisp in the muted city.

Toko turned the corner and flung a snowball as hard as she could. Komaru ducked in vain. It smacked her right in the side. She burst out laughing as she collapsed into the snow, clutching her chest like her ribs could be broken by her own humor. Toko joined her, painful, glorious, jubilant chuckling rising through the lonesome air. A small pocket of sunshine in a tranquility oppressive cloud of screeching silence. They were truly alone, and truly together. 

Toko came to Komaru, bending down to take her hand in hers. 

Komaru looked into her eyes. Her glasses were awkwardly skewed, the snow stuck in clumps in her hair. But now, the growing silver light in her eyes was the brightest it had ever been, illuminated with a gaiety she'd never been blessed with before. It was exquisitely beautiful.

She leaned up to kiss her, her lips soft but together for only a moment. She drew back in surprise.

Toko looked confused. "What?"

"Do you hear that?"

"Hear what?"

A smile spread across her face. "The bells."

The soft ringing of silver bells is raised along with the wind. The gentle tintinnabulation was the unmistakable sound of Christmas.

They sat, barely whispering a breath. Staring into the slate coated sky, held captivated by such a new sensation. In all their time since the Tragedy, no one had heard the kind raindrops of church bells. They held each other close, the cold catching up to them. But it could never truly catch up to them. Not as long as they had each other.

"I love you Toki."

"I love you too, Omaru."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this chapter took so long! So much for Christmas bells. I do think though, it's the best chapter yet, so thank you guys so much for reading! Always here for suggestions and critic!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes, the past needs to stay there.

No one ever talks about where Cinderella got her name. They talk about the little glass slipper, and happily ever after. Not the times she scraped ashes and soot from dirty, cramped fireplaces. Locked closets weren't burnt fireplaces, and her foot would never fit into any shoe smaller than her unladylike and clumsy size 8, but being with Komaru made her feel like Cinderella anyway.

The snow had never been related to joy for Toko. Not at any point in her life did she have a snowball fight with friends, or make snow angels with her parents. Though once, one of her mothers  _ accidentally _ pushed her face-first into the snow. That wasn't the fondest memory, looking back. However, now the post heavy snowfall air seemed lighter around her, while she trudged through it side by side with her girlfriend. Her  _ princess  _ charming. The figurine of an archangel in a divinely thin mist of light. Komaru's fingers trembled intertwined with her own. They felt like icicles when they first came together, but like icicles they were inclined to melt. And now their hands touching even a bit was intimately tepid in the frigid city.

After their snowball debacle, they finally decided to locate Byakuya, wherever he managed to end up. They were circling the surrounding blocks, but the only footprints they could find were their own. 

"Do you think he's in the other direction? We did get pretty turned around chasing each other," Komaru asked mischievously. When Toko didn't respond, her face dropped, back to  _ 'oh no! Where's Byakuya?'. _ Her face looked worried, off from her playful tone. It bugged Toko. Like she wasn't being genuine in her concern. And Komaru wasn't a good liar.

She started off slowly. "He might be. It feels like we're chasing our own tail." Uneasily she looked toward the ground. "Can I ask you something?"

Komaru cocked her head to the side, her hair swaying animatedly in the way it always did. "What's up Toki?"

"What do you think about Byakuya? I know you two haven't exactly gotten along in the past." Toko drew her hand away from Komaru, instead clasping it in her own. It wasn't as comforting, and surprisingly more clammy.

Komaru looked slightly taken aback. "Woah. Where did that come from?" 

Toko grumbled. "Just answer."

"Okay, geez. Truthfully?" Her gaze stayed glued to the ice. "I don't think he's a very empathetic person. Sure he's smart and all, but he's always so distant. Like nothing  _ below  _ him affects him, and he's so smug. But I know he  **has ** to be bluffing, which makes it so much worse." She sighed. "I know that he means a lot to you or whatever, but I feel like… I feel like he's unfair and plainly mean to you constantly." Her arms folded on her chest and avoided looking back toward Toko.

Toko suddenly felt guilty. Sourness rose in the back of her throat, stinging in her chest. "Well, truthfully," She placed her hand on Komaru's shoulder, stopping her in her tracks and turning Komaru towards her. "He doesn't mean that much to me anymore." 

Her malcontented expression softened, curling up into a gentle and adoring smile. Her arms unfurled, snaking down around Toko's waist. They came together to a kiss, pressed flush against each other. Her heart fluttered in her chest, every reservation wiped completely clean.

She savored this feeling. It spread from her chest like phoenix wings from ashes. Like something she'd never felt before Komaru, only imagined and described.

Love.

Now she felt another thing on the tip of her tongue. That she needed to say.

She pulled herself off of her supple glossy lips. It left her mouth tasting like strawberries. "You mean a whole lot more to me," she whispered.

Komaru blushed. Their faces were close enough to feel the amatory heat. Or maybe she was just blushing too.

"I love you." Her voice was shaking, but she meant it with her whole heart. It wasn't the first time, but this time was special. It was a moment she'd written, a deep seated confession that came in it's unique time. When the characters had grown to their potential. Completed their arch, and ready to begin the epilogue chapters. The chapters where they live out a happy ending. That moment that love was in perfect blossom.

"I love you too," Komaru whispered. Their lips were soft together, like deep-maroon velvet under your hand. She draped her arms around her neck, pulling the taller girl close. Komaru's hands were firm in the small of her back, her lips toying at a smile but never drawing away. 

She felt peaceful here. Calm like the gently falling snow, banking in thick drifts on rooftops and storefronts. The navy satin of Komaru's sailor fuku under her fingers was silky and smooth. Her lithe fingers ran up along the younger girl's spine, twirling into the short wefts of the coarse and crooked undercut Komaru had insisted she do herself.

Komaru's kiss was kind and fierce at the same time. Passionately holding her close, but tongues fighting intensely. If it wasn't so fervent she'd think it was a battle. But the tumultuous, ardent and eager love of Komaru was uniquely her own, and unmistakably consummate. She let herself melt into the kiss, replacing heart over mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is a short chapter, I know it's been a bit, too. I've been really unmotivated, and I fucking hate this chapter, so next chapter there's gonna be shameless Syo porn. Cause fuck you, that's why. Or more like, fuck Komaru.
> 
> Thanks for reading, I'm sorry in advance.


End file.
